and life goes on

Last week two new little friends came to stay with us. A little girl who is almost three and her little one year old bro. This is our first guest that can talk. Knowing they are sad is one thing but hearing the words of a child who just wants her Mommy is so very heartbreaking. The little guy is afraid of men so he follows me like my little shadow. When I sit, he sits at my feet or reaches up to be held. When he is in his high chair his sweet sad eyes follow me. Everyday is a little better for him. I compare his grief to my little one. I think this is how she must have been. It makes me both sad and feel better at the same time.The boys are stoked to have another boy in the house. The little miss works very hard at being a good girl, she is very polite and sweet. She likes playing with all of the kids especially Bunny. Bunny pointed out there are NINE children now. Holy crap. Nine children. We had to call in reinforcements so we do not lose our minds. Miss Kim and Miss Elizabeth are helping us on the weekends. We had a few rough days but are settling into a nice routine. I only had to get up once last night. Having them here is distracting us from our grief. I only cry in the shower now or when I am alone at work. Tomorrow I meet the newbies Mama so she can see who has her children. It’s called an icebreaker. I hate meeting the parents it’s very stressful.

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